About Me
Hey, I’m Mike.
I help people understand what’s driving their reactions, their patterns, and the tension they keep running into in the relationships that matter most.
But this didn’t start as something I was teaching.
It started with me.
For a long time, things in my life looked good on the outside.
I had meaningful work. A great family. A lot to be grateful for.
And yet, something felt off.
I wasn’t unhappy, but I felt stuck.
Like I had gone as far as I could go with the tools I had,
and didn’t know what was missing.
Then a friend asked me a simple question:
“Mike, have you ever heard of the Enneagram?”
I hadn’t. And to be honest, I was skeptical.
But what I discovered surprised me.
For the first time, I started to see what was actually driving my reactions, the patterns beneath the surface shaping how I interpreted situations, responded to people, and navigated stress, conflict, and even success.
It was like realizing I’d been living on autopilot and finally being given a dashboard.
And what surprised me most wasn’t what I saw in others.
It was what I hadn’t seen in myself.
I started to notice the gap between my intentions and my impact.
The ways I was misreading situations, overreacting in some moments, and missing what was really going on in others.
And once I could see it, things started to change.
I wasn’t just reacting less. I was understanding more.
Conversations got easier.
Situations that used to feel tense started to make more sense.
And that shift didn’t just stay in my own head.
My wife and I went through this process together, and it reshaped how we understand each other.
Instead of reacting to each other’s blind spots, we could see them, laugh about them, and respond with more clarity and less defensiveness.
It made a real difference in our marriage.
That experience is what led me deeper into this work.
Over time, people started asking for help making sense of their own patterns, their own relationships, and their own stuck places.
And what I’ve learned is this:
Most of us don’t struggle because we don’t care.
We struggle because we don’t fully understand what’s driving us.
For over two decades, I’ve been walking with people through the relationships that matter most, creating space for honest conversations, deeper understanding, and real change without pressure or judgment.
My Purpose Today
My purpose is simple:
to help people grow healthier relationships by understanding themselves more clearly.
Not through pressure.
Not through pretending.
But through awareness, honesty, and real conversation.
My Family
My wife and I have been best friends since 10th grade. We dated, broke up a few times, eventually figured out we were better together, and have now been married for more than 25 years.
Today, Tanya serves as Chief of Staff at a growing non-profit organization. She’s my partner in every adventure.
We have four incredible kids, ages 18 to 26, and we’re grateful they still love spending time with us. Either we’re fun, or they’re amazing actors. Either way, we're grateful.
Our 25th anniversary vow renewal in Hawaii, 25 years in, and still learning.
How I Think and Work
A few things that shape how I show up in this work.
I tend to sit somewhere between reflection and engagement.
I think deeply and independently, but I’m equally energized by real conversation, where things are being worked out in the moment.
That balance allows me to slow things down when needed and step in when clarity or momentum matters.
I use a few different tools and frameworks in my work, not as labels, but as lenses.
They help make sense of the patterns we all have, including how we think, react, communicate, and make decisions, especially in the moments that matter most.
But the tools aren’t the point.
Understanding is.
At my core, I care about three things:
Helping people see what may be influencing them beneath the surface
Reducing unnecessary reactivity
Turning insight into meaningful forward movement
In short:
I value clarity over noise, substance over performance, and growth that is both grounded and sustainable.
A Few Things About Me
Life isn’t all serious, so here are a few things that bring me joy:
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I’m a hardcore Survivor fan, still applying, and still waiting for Jeff Probst to call.
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I love CrossFit, mostly for the community, and partly for the workouts.
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At 16, I was scouted by an MLB team as a pitcher. I'm a lifelong Toronto Blue Jays fan.
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I’ve spent a lot of my life on stages leading music and performing, which explains why I’m pretty comfortable in front of a crowd.
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Pixar movies tend to get me every time.
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And I have a deep appreciation for sharp, slightly absurd comedy, from Monty Python to more modern stuff.
If you’ve ever found yourself thinking…
Why does this keep happening in my relationships?
Why do I react this way, even when I’m trying not to?
Why does something small turn into something bigger than it should?
You’re not alone.
And more importantly, you’re not stuck.
Most of us don’t struggle because we don’t care.
We struggle because we don’t fully understand what’s driving us.
There are patterns underneath those moments.
And once you can see them clearly, things start to change.
Conversations feel different.
Reactions slow down.
And the relationships that once felt complicated start to make more sense.
If you’re trying to understand yourself more clearly,
or stop repeating the same patterns in your relationships,
this is a simple place to start.
Want to understand why your relationships keep going sideways?
No spam, just practical insight to help you grow.